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EASTER IS COMING!
WEEKLY FOOD FOR THOUGHT Need an inspirational thought...a chuckle or two... something to inspire you and get you through the day? Well, you've come to the right place. Check here at least weekly for new bits of inspiration. Sometimes more than once per week...sometimes not...but check often so you don't miss anything.
* * * * * * * * * * * (Tuesday,
March 15)
This is a parody of the Myer's-Brigg
personality test, which is based on Jungian personality typology (say
that fast 5 times!). I didn't know what all the letter designations (ISTJ,
ISTP, etc.) meant, but still got the Funny. ISTP: God, help me to consider people's feelings, even if most of them ARE hypersensitive. ESTP: God, help me to take responsibility for my own actions, even though they're usually NOT my fault. ESTJ: God, help me to not try to RUN everything. But, if You need some help, just ask. ISFJ: Lord, help me to be more laid back and help me to do it EXACTLY right. ISFP: Lord, help me to stand up for my rights (if you don't mind my asking). ESFP: God, help me to take things more seriously, especially parties and dancing. ESFJ: God, give me patience, and I mean right NOW. INFJ: Lord, help me not to be a perfectionist. (Did I spell that correctly?) INFP: God, help me to finish everything I sta ENFP: God, help me to keep my mind on one th - Look a bird! - at a time. ENFJ: God, help me to do only what I can and trust you for the rest. Do you mind putting that in writing? INTJ: Lord, keep me open to other's ideas, *wrong* though they may be. INTP: Lord, help me to be less independent, but let me do it my way. ENTP: Lord, help me follow established procedures today. On second thought, I'll settle for a few minutes. ENTJ: Lord, help me slow downandnotrushthroughwhatIdo. * * * * * * * * * * * (Tuesday, March 1) (Wednesday,
March 26) I totally agree with Barbara...so let's start March with some great chuckles!!!! THINGS YOU WOULD NEVER KNOW WITHOUT THE MOVIE INDUSTRY ~ Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the
price range of most people--whether they're employed or not. ~ Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society. ~ It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts--your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors. ~ When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your bedroom will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish. ~ Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape. ~ During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once. ~ Most dogs are immortal. ~ All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread. ~ It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down. ~ The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty. ~ You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home. ~ The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris. ~ A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds. ~ It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning or ending phone conversations. ~ Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments. ~ All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off. ~ A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. ~ If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps. ~ When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
~ Television news bulletins
usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise
moment.
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